…as time goes by

Sept. 1st was my last post….that feels like more than a month ago. Time has simultaneously sped up and slowed to a crawl somehow. I am completely sucked of energy: some of that is the hot and humid weather (or rain) and some is the diagnosis and the unrelenting tests and wait. I found a new ‘team’ (oncologist and surgeon) who are more aggressive than the previous ‘team’ and they had tests of their own preferences to do before we proceed. Fingers-crossed, hopefully surgery in early October. Otherwise, pending the oncotype DX test results, I am looking at chemo for 4-6 months. That creates another whole LARGE problem besides the obvious: work. I can’t take FMLA (I haven’t been there a year until March 6, 2019) and my director and supervisor consider me a liability to the department and, therefore, replaceable. Short-term disability is 12 weeks (and right now I’m not sure I have long-term – I think I do but I have to look into that my next shift) and if I don’t have a job, thus no income, but more importantly now, no insurance with a “pre-existing condition”. I told all this (and more) to my British friend yesterday and she cried, not just becaise of the diagnosis but because the “most powerful, greatest country in the world” doesn’t give two-shits about its citizens. She told me in Europe I’d have been treated, recuperated months ago and need not worry about my job  meanwhile. She said European citizens have no idea how fortunate they are and I said American’s have no idea how bad we have it…until it’s them personally…then it’s a big, wake-up call.

stream-of-consciousness-saturday-2018-19#SoCS: post



  1. words can’t express … enough. In Australia, the healthcare system is slightly better, but the disability takes so long the treatment is finished by the time it comes through.
    I’m trying to send you some high-octane optimism, energy, and speedy resolutions.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I am so sorry to read this. Its so hard to wrap my head around such a rich country refusing people health care. As if you don’t have enough fears and worry from the cancer.
    I hope your employer is not as callous.


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